Steve Martorano 
The Behavioral Corner is produced in partnership with Retreat Behavioral Health -- where healing happens.

The Behavioral Corner 
Hi, and welcome. I'm Steve Martorano, and this is the Behavioral Corner. You're invited to hang with us as we discuss how we live today, the choices we make, what we do, and how they affect our health and well-being. So you're on the corner, the Behavioral Corner. Please hang around for a while.

Steve Martorano 
Hi, everybody, welcome to the behavioral corner. It's me again, Steve Martorano, you know what I do, I hang here on the corner of Behavioral and Corner. And I look for interesting people to stop by. None of that really happens. It's a conceit, you know that. Anyway, we talk about everything because that's what affects our behavioral health, just about everything. The Behavioral and Corner is brought to you in conjunction with our underwriting partners, Retreat Behavioral Health, and you'll hear more about them a little bit down the road. We're going to talk about something that we've touched upon many times in the past. It is much in the news and strangely enough, we don't know enough about it. The topic is, of course, social media and its impact on youth, young people. Just briefly before I introduce our young guests. This is from the Attorney General's Advisory Board, on the issue of social media, and youth mental health, the Surgeon General's group said: "Social media is used by youth. In nearly uniform universal form." These numbers are staggering. "Up to 95% of kids between the ages of 13 and 17 report using social media platforms of one form or another, with more than a third of that group saying that they're on them constantly." They must have talked to some of my family members. Anyway, "Thirteen," according to a surgeon general's group, "is most commonly the required minimum age to use social media platforms in this country, but nearly 40% of the people using them are between the ages of eight and 12, who use social media. Despite this widespread use among children and adolescents. And the robust data dependent study analysis on the impact has not yet been done." So the Surgeon General is saying we need more research. "More research is needed to fully understand the impact of social media. Currently, the body of evidence suggests indicates that while social media may have benefits for some children and adolescents, there are ample indicators that social media can have a profound risk of harm to the mental health and well-being of our children." So who do we go get to talk about this, we get some middle-aged guy to talk to a really much older guy than that about that, you know, do we get an academic but we could we have but now we thought we'd go to somebody who has actually been in the trenches with regard to living in this social media world. And that is our guest on the corner this morning. Colton Fidelman. Colton is an 18-year-old high school student from San Diego, California. And as I said, he's been there and done that this fellow is an expert on social media, because he's lived it. Colton, thanks for joining us on the Corner.

Colton Fidelman 
Morning, Steve. Thank you for letting me on.

Steve Martorano 
He's also an author of a forthcoming book. And we'll tell you more about that just ahead. But this is a fascinating topic and we're grateful for your time. Colton, how did you come to this state where you're now you know, thinking it's time to start talking about social media? What was your relationship growing up with social media?

Colton Fidelman 
Well, I have been an avid social media user for an extremely long time. I started using at around age 12 When I got my first phone. And I've been watching YouTube before that. And I just, I've seen everything happen. I've seen the changes that have occurred in society because of social media. I've observed my friends change and people change in general and people trying to appeal to others more because of it. And it's really generated a drastic change. And in today's environment.

Steve Martorano 
You I guess, are the first generation that was born into this. It didn't. It didn't arrive after you were born. It didn't arrive in the middle of your adolescence. It was there when you got here.

Colton Fidelman  
I was about five years old when it really started. I think Facebook was still around when I was born, in 2005. But yeah, I would say that for as long as I could remember there were things sources like that around where I can access the internet and talk to people and do all the things you can on social media.

Steve Martorano 
I'm guessing though that it was the introduction to the phone that changed everything for you.

Colton Fidelman 
Yes, the digital phone is able to buy apps and use or play games and talk to people watch videos, and all that type of stuff.

Steve Martorano 
Prior to that, it was the internet and social media for people your age and everybody for that matter before the iPhone it was a passive experience. It was not unlike watching television, you said YouTube, you could look at things and it was very passive. Once smartphones become ubiquitous, everybody has one, then the game changed. Can you tell us about that? Well, first of all, how old were you when you got your first internet-connected telephone?

Colton Fidelman 
Twelve.

Steve Martorano 
Twelve years old. Did you apply that pressure? Did your parents say no, it's time for you to have a smartphone? How did it work?

Colton Fidelman 
Well, I started with a 3DS. And first grade, no one knows what those are anymore. But...

Steve Martorano 
What are they? For those of us who don't know what they are.

Colton Fidelman 
It's like a Gameboy...some of you guys would remember, it's a newer version of that. But it's in 3D. So it's a little bit more attractive. But yeah, I got my first phone. And I think it was really me who applied the pressure. And so I got my mom's old iPhone 5. And I was happy with it. I was extremely happy to have a phone because it meant that I could talk to my friends.

Steve Martorano 
Was there any pushback from Mom about the phone at age 12?

Colton Fidelman
There was a little bit. My parents didn't allow me to really use electronics that much. They take the 3DS away, I'd have it only for like the bus at school and stuff like that. There was not a lot of internet phone usage before that. And so after I'd asked for it, they finally gave in, I thought I was older and mature enough to be able to be using that type of stuff. And...

Steve Martorano 
Parents are in a tough spot with kids your age with the group we're talking about. And that you go off to school. And when I grew up, and when everybody before me grew up forever, that was a completely safe transaction. You sent your young, very young children off to a school and you were completely assured they were going to be safe. And they would be home at three o'clock in the afternoon, and everything would be fine. We don't live in that world anymore, as you know, parents just at the dawn of this technology, thought I must stay in contact with my kids 24/7 I need to be able to get a hold of them. Right?

Colton Fidelman 
Yes. Yeah.

Steve Martorano 
So when they look at...when they try to weigh, "Should I give them a phone or shouldn't I get them a phone?" That safety thing comes right up, you know, that parental protection thing. So yeah, give them a phone, it's better? Would you have been okay, if they had just given you a phone that wasn't hooked up to the internet?

Colton Fidelman 
Like a flip phone?

Steve Martorano  
Yeah, just a phone just so they could call you? Would you have been okay with that or would you...you grouse right? You would have groused about that?

Colton Fidelman 
So I do think expectations are incredibly important. And as a 12-year-old, you're not exactly expecting an iPhone 14. I mean, maybe today they are. When I was 12. I think any form of communication between my parents, whenever I wanted would be enough. Maybe later on, I probably would have wanted more. Just like all kids. Yeah, but I think personally, yeah, I would have been fine with a phone that wasn't exactly connected to the internet.

Steve Martorano 
Did you make the argument that all your friends have it?

Colton Fidelman 
Yes, of course, that was the same with a 3DS. That's right. That's the argument all kids make?

Steve Martorano 
Well, there's a lot of truth to that. Right? So tell me about your experience getting deeper and deeper into it. Did you reach a point where you felt now looking back that you were on the phone? almost constantly?

Colton Fidelman 
Yes. Looking back, I remember when I first installed Instagram. And after that, I was constantly trying to get followers and post things that were interesting. And it didn't work very well. I was not very good at it at first. Nobody, nobody ever is. But yeah, I think once I started realizing that being cool was attributed to how many followers you had...how many friends you had online, I started really wanting, to get that. Because I wanted to be cool and fit and stuff like that. And so I did whatever it took to do the best I could on social media. And that took a lot of time. So I had to spend a lot of time.

Steve Martorano 
It rapidly became a performance activity you were performing. And you know, when I was young, and everybody before me and after me, except for you guys. There was a period of time when you had to perform for your peers. And that was usually during school and when you were socializing, but you were in a 24/7 race to be cool, right?

Colton Fidelman 
Yes, exactly.

Steve Martorano 
It never stopped.

Colton Fidelman 
I was constantly trying to get people to like my posts because...because I was posting...I was posting memes. Do you know what memes are?

Steve Martorano 
Yeah. Yeah, Please. Yes. Thanks for asking.

Colton Fidelman 
Yeah, I'm sorry...

Steve Martorano 
So you would come up with something you thought was very clever. You'd slap it up there and wait for validation, right?

Colton Fidelman 
Exactly. When it didn't come? I wasn't exactly very happy. And I think that's something that you know, is very important to talk about, because expectations, especially now with things like video games as well. People are always expecting things to be so fast. And so when I didn't get that validation immediately it was very difficult to deal with that. And so I think that's another problem kids are going through.

Steve Martorano  
Well, you personally had...well you have a diagnosis of attention deficit disorder as well as depression?

Colton Fidelman 
Yes.

Steve Martorano 
Did that diagnosis precede your social media thing? Or did it happen after social media?

Colton Fidelman 
So in middle school is when I started using social media, and I was diagnosed with ADHD and fourth grade. But depression was later on it was eighth grade. So I think social media played a big part, a really big part, and that diagnosis.

Steve Martorano 
How did you how did your depression manifest itself? Did you...what were you...what were you feeling? And what were you doing?

Colton Fidelman 
I really didn't want to do anything. I found no interest in anything around me. I didn't want to go outside. I didn't want to get out of bed. I just wanted to really sit on my phone and watch videos and stuff like that. And that was...that was definitely a problem because I was losing a lot of friends that way.

Steve Martorano 
It's a great irony of social media that it was intended to bring people together...

Colton Fidelman 
Yes.

Steve Martorano 
...and what we're seeing is that it has a great isolation effect. You say you didn't want to do this and you didn't want to leave the house and you didn't want to get engaged. You're talking about the real-world level. You were still attached to social media, even though you were depressed, right?

Colton Fidelman 
Yeah, like I said, watching videos and sitting on Instagram or Snapchat things like that and never getting off always expecting replies or new interesting things and when I couldn't find them, it made it even worse.

Steve Martorano 
Were there battles with the house about putting the phone down?

Colton Fidelman 
There was an Xbox as well.

Steve Martorano 
Right.

Colton Fidelman 
My parents did not like me on the phone that much and they actually installed this internet thing that basically kept me from using certain apps. It was like locked apps. It was called OurPact, I think

Steve Martorano 
So your parents were actively involved and saw the problem and saw that you were spending too much time not benefiting from it, in fact, curating perhaps, and got as involved as a could in trying to monitor it. Given that was an honest and sincere effort on their part. How do you feel about looking back on their efforts? Did it help at all it really slow you down. Social media-wise?

Colton Fidelman 
No, I've always been a little bit of a resourceful kid. And so I tried whatever I could to get around it. And when I finally did get around it, like I guess the security passcode to my phone so I could turn it off. But when I finally did get it, I was right back on. And it's like an addiction. It's literally an addiction. You can take it away through things like rehab. But eventually, if you are introduced back into that addiction, you're going to keep on doing it then

Steve Martorano 
You're absolutely right. It is what's referred to as a process addiction. It has to do with behavior rather than substances. But it is. It's incredibly addictive. And you recognize that with yourself. So, when do you feel you're 18 now, this whole slide down the rabbit hole of social media began when you were like, in middle school, when did you begin to go? I gotta do something about this. I can't keep living like this. When did that happen?

Colton Fidelman 
I gained a lot of weight in 2020, around COVID and that was as a result of sitting on my butt all day and on the phone. I realized that this addiction was nothing more than it was baseless. There was no fruition to it. It wasn't doing anything for me. I realized that my future depended heavily on what I did then. And sitting on social media is merely just wasting time. And because I wasn't playing any sports and I wasn't really hanging out with friends all that much sitting on the phone isn't going to do anything. And so I realized that like I'm just going to be sitting here and sad all the time and the phone...see it's a lot like trucks like like I talked about, you know, with addiction, it's a lot like drugs, drugs make you feel better, but they're also digging you that hole that you're trying to get out of. So you know when you keep on subjecting yourself to what you're addicted to you may be feeling better in the moment but you're wasting your time and you're basically coping with a problem that you're you it's like it's like a cycle. Okay, you're coping with the issue by using the issue. So it's a big problem.

Steve Martorano 
It's a very vicious cycle. You're right. You're right to compare it to drug use. Drugs start out generally to alleviate some kind of pain that you're having. And then they become the pain. So that's a deadly trap. It can it can you know, it does destroy lives. Our guest is Colton Fidelman. He is the author of a forthcoming book called The Teenage Guide to Becoming Successful. That's a very bold premise for an 18-year-old guy who can't wait to get into here...get into a little bit of that and find out what suggestions you have about this thing. So what were the real go-to places for you? You've mentioned Instagram and Snapchat and TikTok. Was that a big deal for you?

Colton Fidelman 
Oh, yes. TikTok. Nowadays, I mean, TikTok is new. So when I was younger, I wasn't using it because it didn't exist, Musically, was in the place of TikTok. It was its predecessor. And so a lot of people were using this app called Musically, where you can make music videos and constant swiping. It's not like Instagram.

Steve Martorano 
So you are an active participant. You didn't interact with social media passively. You posted stuff, right?

Colton Fidelman 
Yes.

Steve Martorano 
Yeah. Yeah. What was your relationship with your friends? I mean, not the friends we talk about on social media, but your actual friends? Did that number grow? Or did it get smaller?

Colton Fidelman 
For the most part, it got smaller. Because I was expecting them to be people who they weren't through what I was viewing on places like Instagram, Snapchat, YouTube, and all that stuff. I expected them to be better than they were. So I'd alienate them. And I wouldn't focus on them. I wouldn't ask them to hang out. And so it was...it was...

Steve Martorano 
Because you would look at what they were posting and say they're a fraud. That's just not true. And that would embittered you towards them. Is that the process?

Colton Fidelman 
That was one of the reasons I'd also look at their behavior. And I'd be like, Oh, they're boring, because they're not like xxxx. They're not like this person who I'm watching. And so I'd be like, well, I could just sit on YouTube and be more entertained than the person I'd be hanging out with here. And that was a problem.

Steve Martorano 
When you were deep into it, what athletes celebrities, notable people authors, who did you follow closely?

Colton Fidelman 
Online, it wasn't so much admiration as it was entertainment. I expected my friends to be more entertaining, basically. Right? But there were a few people. There's this video game called Destiny. And I'd watched a lot of YouTubers from that. I don't know if they're so so well known. One name is Mr. Fruits. He was interesting. There are a few other personalities, not people, I guess I would remember now because I think they're a bit smaller.

Steve Martorano 
You mentioned the pandemic, that was the perfect storm for the growth of this stuff because we were all trapped.

Colton Fidelman 
Yes.

Steve Martorano 
And on one level, the internet was a godsend. We, you know, spent vacations together virtually, and we went to parties together Some folks said goodbye to loved ones who got sick, virtually. So it was a godsend. On the other side of the equation, is this isolation, because you say you gained a lot. How much weight did you gain? I gained weight during the pandemic, too. How much did you gain?

Colton Fidelman 
Sixty pounds?

Steve Martorano 
Wow.

Colton Fidelman 
Yeah.

Steve Martorano 
That's a lot of Cheetos.

Colton Fidelman 
Yeah, it is. It was actually a lot of Cheetos, I will be honest. But yeah, you're completely right about that. We did spend a lot of time on social media over COVID Because we had to, but it also meant that we became more reliant on it. I think addictions formed because of that.

Steve Martorano 
Well, it was like a life...it was like a...it was like a life preserver thrown to us that was in fact, made of cement,

Colton Fidelman  
Like a trap, you know, it's carrying you out of the water, but you're still you know, you got that bear trap on your arm, you know, you're bleeding.

Steve Martorano 
Sooner or later, you're gonna be dragged down under. What was the effect socially on you, and you're dating, and when we started to come out from under the pandemic, and you can actually be with somebody? Did social media, enhance your social life? Or diminish it? Who did it affect at all?

Colton Fidelman  
Well, past COVID, I actually kind of got away from social media a lot. This was when I started the booking process. And when I realized, you know, it's, it's kind of just a big waste of time. But I would say in general, for a lot of people, I would say, it probably got worse if you if you know a lot about what's going on in social media now expectations for women and men alike have changed completely. And you have very large internet personalities talking about it all the time, and how men should act and how women should act. And so I think because people are holding these high, high expectations for people. It's causing a problem and I think for me, personally Yeah, I think it's an issue when trying to find a partner. You know, I want them to be super pretty, super interesting, super funny, but maybe that's just impossible, and I'm expecting something too much.

Steve Martorano 
What did social media tell you about what you needed to do to be a successful young man? What did he tell you about being a young man?

Colton Fidelman 
You have to be working 100% of the time, you have to be morally perfect. You always have to be on top of things and talk to people all the time and be appealing. You have to follow a very specific religion. I mean, it's not it's not it's not like Christianity, or Islam or anything like that. It's more like the social media religion of being a man. I think a lot of it might be right. But a lot of it's also wrong, I think I think it's very specific to the person who's who's listening. And it's not always going to apply to them. And that's kind of the issue here. People are adopting this personality that for the long term is not going to be able to be sustained by the skills that they have.

Steve Martorano 
Yeah, it's tough to be on stage all the time.

Colton Fidelman 
Yes.

Steve Martorano  
You know, the greatest actors in the world, went home at night and became who they were.

Colton Fidelman 
Yeah.

Steve Martorano 
Social media, it's impossible to do that for young people. How are your perception of women changing? As you watch what they do, how they react to social media. It seems to me that women are under a different kind of pressure. Vis-à-vis both, I think men and women have the same...young people have the same problem with social media, and sometimes the same benefits. But I think it's it's tougher for girls, do you agree?

Colton Fidelman 
I think girls have always had and have always tried to not try, they've always been expected to follow this stigma to be a certain way, which, like I said, it's not always going to fit the person. Right? Like, they're not going to, it's not going to fit. If you if you expect a woman to be like a housewife, right? If you expect them to be at home all the time cooking and cleaning or anything like that. That's not going to fit a lot of women's personalities. And I think social media, at least now is pushing that.

Steve Martorano 
And then they were under enormous pressure to look a certain way.

Colton Fidelman 
Oh, yes. That's, that's probably the biggest one. I mean, you see on Tik Tok, and on Instagram, you're constantly seeing these gorgeous supermodels. Which, you know, obviously, no one's going to be able to look like that. And besides maybe 1% of the population. And so it's going to create this stigma. Where women feel like, you know, if they don't look like the person they see online, they're not good enough.

Steve Martorano 
Yeah. And I think there's nothing...nothing hidden about this. A whole genre of people now call themselves influencers. Even just the straight definition of what an influencer is, it's obviously someone that's trying to make you think something or feel something the same way they do. And these are people make a lot of some...make a lot of money influencing you that if you don't dress like this, use this lipstick, you're not going to be popular. I have gotta tell you something, a lot of people my age would love in the past, we go, boy, if I wish I was younger. I don't wish I was young. I don't know what I would do if I had to deal with that stuff the way you guys do. So tell me about the book. People out there are going to look at this and go who's an 18-year-old kid telling me how to be successful? Come on! What was the motivation for that? Why did you decide you had something to say?

Colton Fidelman 
Well, I decided I had something to say because I felt like I knew a lot. I mean, this was after I'd lost that 60 pounds after I'd worked my butt off to do it. And I realized that there's a lot to pull from that. There are a lot of things to learn from, from working hard and staying at something for a long period of time. I mean, it's the same case with almost everything. I mean, with your podcast itself, you've probably been at this for a while. And you've seen success with it. And I think that it's the same case as everything else. And I realized that this can be applied to a lot of different things. And I think that that was really important to get out there.

Steve Martorano 
It's interesting, the weight loss effort is interesting. So I take it that when you were merely a social media creature, almost 24/7 You weren't getting a lot of positive feedback, "Look what I'm accomplishing when you woke up and found yourself 60 pounds overweight," and said I'll do something about this. You got positive feedback. It's interesting. If there's anything glaringly wrong with social media, maybe it doesn't build self-esteem in the right kind of way, you know, through effort and work.

Colton Fidelman 
Yeah, people expect to lose all this weight and you know, get all those big muscles immediately. They expect to be huge immediately and it's not going to happen that way. And so when you wake up and you know, you cut calories for a day and you're not you know, skinny all of a sudden you're gonna be like, "Well, that sucks." You know, I can't do it, I guess. And I actually...I personally had the same issue. I was like, I've been at this for two weeks and nothing's happening. I'm not seeing any results. And it was up to me to keep on pushing. Well, as someone who's,

Steve Martorano 
You know, gained and lost my share of weight, I can tell you it's a great positive reinforcer when you step on the scale and go "Oh, look, I lost two pounds". That's a huge, huge reinforcer. Colton, what role if any, did pornography pay...play in your life while you were deep into the internet and social media?

Colton Fidelman 
So it really ruined? Because I did have an issue with this earlier on, like, seventh eighth grade, it did have a big issue with my perception of people in general. I mean, when you're constantly looking at that stuff, it's...it's just...it's bad. It's like, I don't know, really know how to put it. It's...it's interesting, because when you're constantly watching people, you know, have intercourse, sleep with each other. Right? You almost apply that to the people that you're interacting with on a daily basis. Like the girls that you have a crush on, are boys with women both really, it just depends, right? They expect sex to be immediate. And they expect it to be good. And they expect it to be, you know, interesting, and all the things that they see through pornography. And I just say, you know, treat it like any other movie. Your life isn't exactly like, like what you'd see in a Transformers film. So neither should your sex life with porn. So it's kind of like the same thing.

Steve Martorano 
Yeah, it's a real, it's a real problem. I mean, not inherently, you know, after a while, it's all the same anyway. But at 12...8...10...12 years of age, to be introduced to sex, as is depicted on the internet is a big, big problem. A big problem. What is the TikTok formula? I know you talk about that in the book, right?

Colton Fidelman 
So the TikTok formula is basically an analogy, where it's anything that you can apply in real life like it's...it's...it's...TikTok, right? So whenever you're looking at an issue, you have to be able to apply some type of analogy or way of thinking where I know how to solve this problem through these eight steps. And that's basically what TikTok is.

Steve Martorano 
Right.

Colton Fidelman 
And so it has a lot to do with what we've been talking about, social media. But it also explains just through the analogy itself, hard work, mentors, overcoming adversity, you know, money, especially money, because money is exactly the answer. Passion, self-care, education, and stuff like that.

Steve Martorano 
Yeah. Yeah. When's the book coming out? Is the book coming out soon?

Colton Fidelman 
Mid-October.

Steve Martorano 
We'll keep an eye on that. Do you have siblings, by the way? I haven't asked you about that.

Colton Fidelman 
Yes, I have a site.

Steve Martorano 
Older or younger?

Colton Fidelman 
She's 13.

Steve Martorano 
Okay, so are you the big brother who now preaches to her and she goes, leave me alone? How's the relationship? Does he go away? How she reacted to this?

Colton Fidelman 
Well, she's kind of going through the same situation that I did when I was 13. You know, with social media and trying to appeal to people. And to be honest, she's had a lot more success than I have. She's made a lot more friends. And she gets a lot more attention than I did. And so because she's seeing success with that, it's kind of different because I've...I've viewed life through the lens of, well, social media isn't going to work for me. My sister, she's viewing it very differently. So she has a little bit more of a positive opinion with social media.

Steve Martorano 
Well, that makes sense. But I mean, from your vantage point is she in danger of having anything harmful occur just because she's successful with this? Or is she just seem happier, and able to handle it?

Colton Fidelman 
I think this brings us back to the expectations of women to look good. So if she's not perfectly tan, or if she doesn't have the right makeup, or if she has pimples on her face, she's going to freak out with taking pictures, especially and posting them. If there's any pimples on her face. She just refuses, you know, flat out to do it. Because she doesn't want people to think that she's ugly. And she is not ugly. You know, no one thinks she's ugly. But because of the societal expectations placed on her by the perfect people she sees online...

Steve Martorano 
The pressure is always there, right?

Colton Fidelman 
Yes, she has this unrealistic view of herself.

Steve Martorano 
Colton Fidelman as our guest is joining us in advance of the book he's written, which is a guide for success for young people. And it is all been inspired obviously by his struggles with depression, all of which were exacerbated by social media. And he is coming out the other side with a story to tell him we appreciate it. He shared it with us. Have you spoken to your friends about...do your friends know you've written this book? And what do they think about it?

Colton Fidelman 
Yeah, so a lot of them do know that I've written a book. They agree with a lot of it. When I was writing the chapters, I showed them, you know, a little bit of the excerpts that I put down in regards to the chapters and they thought that it was something intriguing and interesting. It was something new to think about. And especially because I've interviewed the main basis of the book is the fact that I interviewed around 20 billionaires, super successful people, and put what they had to say into words and they thought, you know, if I've got a billionaire direct telling me how to do this, it's going to be a lot better and more interesting because they're the most successful people of anyone in the world at least, money...

Steve Martorano 
Monetarily. Which of those rich guys most impressed you?

Colton Fidelman 
There's one, his name is Howard Marks. He's good friends with Warren Buffett. Big stock trader. The owner of Oaktree Capital Management.

Steve Martorano 
Yeah, yeah.

Colton Fidelman 
He's pretty big. And he was very...he was very humble for someone who's so rich. He was very nice and, and easy to speak to.

Steve Martorano 
Did you interview Buffett?

Colton Fidelman 
No. I asked him. Buffett's very busy.

Steve Martorano 
Yeah, he is. So finally I, in spite of the fact you seem...you present as though you've got a handle on this. You saw the downside of this thing. And you know that there's an upside, you want to focus on that. You've written a book about being successful as a young person, but you have abandoned social media, have you?

Colton Fidelman 
No, of course not. I mean, I'm sitting here talking to you now, right? Like, it's all about using it in moderation. It's all about taking what you have, and using it for your own purposes, and not allowing yourself to be chained down to it. It's like, it's like money. A lot of people are also addicted to money. But money is a tool. It's not something that you should base your life around and focus on 100% of the time, because then you'll start to realize that there's, it's empty, there's, there's nothing with money. Money is only a tool and the same things to social media.

Steve Martorano 
Yeah, that's a deep insight. I mean, if people have young people particularly started looking at this thing, it's not something that is using them. But they should be using it, as you say, as a tool, then they may have...they may have turned a significant corner. Colton, thanks so much. When the book comes out. Well, we'll read it and look forward to maybe having you back on again. You'll be out on a book tour. So thanks. Congratulations.

Colton Fidelman 
Thank you.

Steve Martorano 
Is college in your plans?

Colton Fidelman 
Of course, I've been working on applications. That's fun.

Steve Martorano 
Yeah right. Where...as long as you don't use a chat to write your essay.

Colton Fidelman 
No, no, I'm writing...I think it's illegal to do that. I'm writing it myself. I don't want to, you know...

Steve Martorano 
Where would you...where would you like to...where would you like to go?

Colton Fidelman 
I'm actually really interested in engineering. So I've been looking at places like Caltech or MIT, UCLA, USC, stuff like that, places like that to apply to because they definitely have the best programs and I'd like to one day, you know, maybe work at a place like SpaceX or ViaSat, places like that. So...

Steve Martorano 
I think you're gonna be successful whatever you, however, you figure it out. Colton Fidelman, thanks so much for joining us. Good luck with the book and good luck with your life.

Colton Fidelman 
Thank you so much and for anyone who wants to maybe sign up you know, get their email so that they know about the book, teenage.guru, visit there. And you'll be able to at least get updates on what's going on.

Steve Martorano 
We'll post that on the Behavioral Corner website so people will have easy access to it. Thanks again. Colton. Thank you all as well. Don't forget you know the deal. I know Colton certainly does follow us like us, review us. subscribe, and do all that neat stuff. It helps the Corner stay alive. Take care. See you next time on the Behavioral Corner. Bye bye.

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